While the accepted notion of good parenting is to put your children first, parenting self-care must always come into the equation, and here’s why.
On an aircraft, the instruction in the event of a cabin suddenly suffering a loss of air pressure is clear – put on your own oxygen mask before assisting others, a vital practice in self-care for parents. And this fundamental truth is exactly the same when it comes to taking care of your children on terra firma.
Your young ones can only ever be as healthy and happy as you are, given that they rely on you to be their steady, positive influence, which underscores the importance of self-care. So, prioritising your own health and happiness isn’t selfish – it’s necessary for ensuring you have the energy, patience and mental clarity to be the best parent you can be.
Preserving Yourself
The benefits of looking after ourselves are obvious and don’t need to be stated, yet the benefits go further than that, because when youngsters see a parent taking time to exercise, or eat well, or rest, or pursue personal interests, they learn the importance of maintaining their own well-being. And it is this modelling that helps them develop healthy habits for life.
As an extension, being firm and fair on your children, just as you are yourself, offers a balanced approach to be emulated, emphasising the importance of self-care for parents.
Disregarding Yourself
If you disregard your own needs, you risk not only your ability to care for your children, but also reinforce the notion that self-neglect is acceptable, which of course it isn’t; practicing self-care is essential.
Witnessing the consequences of such neglect can lead to guilt and regret, which is why it is so important to model good self-care habits from the start.
How To Prioritise Yourself
As adults, the idea of sacrifice is not an alien one – be it money, sleep, time or something else; many of us are used to going without in order to fuel others.
However, making time for your own activities and pleasures is a must for your health and wellbeing. Invest in your body and mind, and do it in a way that ensures you not only have time to start this process, but time to finish it as well.
Remember the value of socialising and seeing different people, and ensure you have adventures outside of the home that aren’t just school drop-offs and pick-ups!
You also need to set boundaries, even if it goes against the instinct that a parent should always be malleable to their wishes of their offspring. Reinforcing your own needs is important for you as an individual, but also in the parent/child mechanic.
Overall, remember that your actions are the antithesis of selfishness, and that by investing small portions of time and love in yourself, you are becoming a better parent in the process.